Kimberly Marrs Vincent..one year later

This is my cousin, Kimberly Marrs Vincent. On Sunday, it will be one year that she passed away tragically from an accident in her home. When I see her picture, I still can't believe someone so pretty and young and full of life is gone. Her twin boys, Brett and Dylan, have had their 4th birthday since she died and her husband, Terry has faced all the "firsts" since she has been gone. I know that he is still grieving and will grieve for along time so remember him and the boys this week and pray for strength. I catch up with Terry on the computer every now and then and he seems to be doing as well as he can but I know he misses her terribly.

Remember to cherish your loved ones during this CHRISTmas and love them and hold them close, because we don't know what tomorrow may bring. And remember too that is "Merry CHRISTmas", not Happy Holidays. Keep CHRIST in CHRISTmas!!!

Alzheimer's SUCKS!!!

I believe, without a doubt,that one of the worst disease's you can get is Alzheimer's.

Imagine waking up one day and not remembering your loved one's name, how to tie your shoe, how to talk, how to walk, how to go to the bathroom, how to communicate what you want...that's what Alz. does. It robs you of everyday things we take for granted. I have experienced Alz. first hand when it reared it's ugly head at my in-laws. Marvin's parents were struck by this dreaded disease and it eventually took their lives. It sucked! They were the best people you could have met. Marvin's children, Vivian's children, and Kenneth's children were robbed of the best grandparents in the world, who would have loved them and spoiled them. Everyday, I wish they were still here, so they could see them grow up and to make memories with them. But God needed them more and I know they are walking with their Lord right now, and that's what makes me smile.

So, today at church, it was announced that one of our beloved members, is in the first stage of dementia and Alz. That SUCKS!!!! He is one of the sweetest, kindest, nicest men in the world. He would do anything for anybody and is very well loved and respected. He is a Godly man, husband, father and deacon. He has always been an encourager and helper and rock.It tears me up to know that someone so special is struggling now. I ask myself why? Why does this happen to good people? Why does it have to happen at all? Why? Why? Why? I am going to ask God that when I see Him face to face. I'm angry! Cancer is treatable, Diabetes is treatable, weight problems are treatable! Why can't this be treatable? Nothing can be done to stop this from happening and it makes me mad!

So, please pray for my friend, Dale and his family, as they deal everyday with this and they will put all their faith and trust in the Lord and that He will care for them and their needs.

Remember too, to tell your loved ones how much you love them and make happy memories and love and forgive and be kind to one another.

Money, Money, Money

Okay, for those of you that know me really well, you know that I have never been a good steward of my finances. I have had a money problem most of my life. As the years have gone by, it has got worse and I take full responsibility for it. I have done some pretty bad things because of my money issues, such as lying to my husband, my parents and to myself. It is so true that the LOVE of money is the root of all evil. I guess you can say I have a love/hate relationship w/ money. I love it when I have it and hate it when I don't. I look back and I see how much money I have wasted over the years and I probably could send at least one of my kids to college!

My parents have bailed me out more times than I can count and If it wasn't for them, I would be out in the street. I have literally made my dad cry because of the messes I have gotten myself into. That broke my heart to see what I have done to him. For that I am truly sorry.

Last year I was diagnosed as bi-polar. My doctor says even though that's what I am I can still be normal. People are under the misconception that because you are bipolar you are crazy. I know for a fact that I am not crazy yet.(lol) I will though be on meds for the rest of my life, partly because of it being hereditary and partly because of anxiety. One of the actions of being bipolar is over spending,impulse shopping, the need to have money and a bunch of other things. I am not saying all this to justify my problem but to know that there is I reason that I do what I do. In the last week, I have faced the fact that I can't have the control of the money in my family. I have finally given that responsibility to Marvin. I made him open up a separate account and I am going to close up our other account so I can't have access to it unless I go through him first. When you help someone who is an alcoholic, you take the alcohol away, I have a money problem so I am taking the money away from myself. I have a loving, supportive husband who will do anything for me and I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him.

It's going to be hard and I may be a bit hard to deal with at home but I know that my family is there to support me, to love me and to pray for me.

That's what's on my heart today. Thanks for listening!!

Pep Band

Matthew plays the snare drum and joined the pep band at school. Last Friday, he marched in the Homecoming Parade for Allen Park High School for the first time. Marvin and I were so excited. My parents came to watch him and Malinda and Tyler were there and so was Jennifer and the kids. (They didn't just come for Matthew:)

When he came around the corner I took pictures while Marvin videoed. Matt saw us and gave a small smile, the kind like he was embarrassed but glad to see us there. I got a little teary eyed, I was so excited and proud!!! Marvin ended up following him all the way down Champaign! Do you think he was proud too!?! It was a lot of fun. Here are some pics.

I didn't cry

Well, the kids all got off to school and I didn't even cry when Matthew went off to middle school. They were all excited and ready to go so Marvin and I took them and dropped them off and then we went to breakfast and enjoyed time alone together.
I Hope Matthew is doing okay. He is the only one I'm worried about. I won't know until 4 today because he has cross country practice after school.

Middle School Boy

So, today I take my little boy (He seems little to me) to the middle school to get his schedule. I tear up thinking that just yesterday he was in my lap drinking a bottle and now he is going into junior high! As we are walking through the school, we are in small groups with 8th graders giving tidbits of information about the school, I watch my little boy turn into a young man growing up and me unable to stop it. Where did all the time go? Gosh, it's so true that they grow up before you know it and if your not paying attention you'll miss it. I need to cherish him more and appreciate the young man that he is becoming.

So, next Wednesday when I take him to school, I will try to hold it all in until he is out of the car and waking into that big building, then I will let the tears fall to know that my little boy is growing up.

My life

Sometimes I wish I could go back and redo my life. I have so many regrets and made many mistakes that I wish I could take back. I went to a funeral today and some of the things that were said really made me think.

One of the things that was talked about was Proverbs 31. If you are familiar with the bible then you know it talks about what a wife should be. Boy, do I fall short! I wish I could be half that kind of wife. I decided that I am going to try harder to be that kind of person.

Do you ever think about your funeral? I know it sounds morbid but it happens to all of us at some point. I always wonder who will come and what they will say about me. Will people that I hurt remember the hurt or will they remember the good. I once heard somewhere that the date of our birth and the date of our death doesn't really matter. What matters is the dash in between. How we lived our life and if we loved and cared about people. I want people to remember me by a person who tried to do her best and tried to be someone who cared about people. I want my family to know how special each one of them is to me and how much I loved them. I want my friends to remember the good times we've had and the laughter that we shared. Not the times where I might have said the wrong things and hurt them and didn't realize it or apologize.

My husband and my children are the reason I go on each day. I don't know where I'd be today if it wasn't for Marvin. He has been the best husband I could have ever asked for. He is a great father to my kids. I have taken him for granted so many times. I truly am blessed to have him in my life.

My children. I can say so much about them and how each one of them is special to me.
Matthew, my firstborn and my only son. I had him for two years before I had Ashlee and it was so much fun. He and I were buddies. We did everything together while Marvin was at work. He is so much like Marvin. It is sweet to see them together.
Ashlee. She was a perfect baby. Always happy and smiling. She was the first girl in the family after my niece, Amber died, so it was a blessing to have her. Lauren and Lyndsey, the twins. That is special enough! Being a mother to twins is a blessing in itself. They are so close to each other and it is neat to see them interact. I always tell Lyndsey that she will always be my baby because she was the last one out! She laughs when I tell her that.

Well, I'm not sure where all this came from, I just started typing what was on my heart. That's what a blog is all about. I guess my main point was to live life to the fullest and make every moment count and try to live with no regrets. Be loving and kind to one another and Love the Lord will all your heart.

The good ole days of Summer

I thought this was interesting. My kids can never find anything to do! When i was a kid most things on this list was true. I wish i could go back to that time and be a kid again.


TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 1930's, 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's!!

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.

Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.

As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags.

Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank Kool-aid made with sugar, but we weren't overweight because,
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or chat rooms.......
WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

If YOU are one of them?CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good.
While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave (and lucky) their parents were.
Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?!

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, DAD!

Let me tell you about my dad. My dad is an amazing man. From the time I was born he was always there for me and my brother. When he was 18, he got a job at Ford as a journeyman(whatever that is!)and has work for Ford ever since. He worked at the Rouge Steel building until they closed it down a few years ago. There were alot of explosions down there and I was always fearful when he would be at work. When they closed the Rouge down, he got sent over to the World Headquarters where he is still today. He can retire whenever but he continues to keep going.

My dad is a hard worker and has always provided for his family. Growing up, we had everything we wanted, not in a spoiling way, but we never needed for anything. We always had a nice home, food on the table, and clothes on our backs. I have alot of happy childhood memories of my dad that I cherish and wouldn't change.

My dad also had the best parents which in turn were the best grandparents. His dad also worked for Ford for many years and he retired. His mom was the best. Growing up they were my Memaw and Papaw and they spoiled us rotten! My Memaw died in August of 1989, and I was so sad for my dad because she was so special to all of us. She was always there for him and got him out of alot of trouble when he was younger. My Papaw died on Christmas Eve in 1994. My heart broke for my dad because now both his parents were gone. It was hard on all of us, especially me because they didn't live to see me become a Christian and marry and have children of my own. They left us with wonderful memories and a legacy.

My dad is also a grandparent to 8. One of those grandkids is with the Lord. In 1987 my brother and his then girlfriend had a baby girl. Her name was Amber Nicole and she was beautiful. We fell in love with her from the minute we saw her. Unfortunately, God needed her more than us because she died of crib death when she was a month old. It was a shock to all of us and we miss her so much. So, after her death, my brother married that girlfriend and we waited two years for them to give us another baby. My nephew Brett was that baby. He didn't replace Amber but he brought back joy to all our lives. Then came Rian and Brandon. I got married in 1995, and in 1996, Marvin and I had Matthew. So, we had four boys and I hoped that we would add another girl to our family. Well, in 1999, I had Ashlee. She was special because she was the first girl after many years without Amber. In 2000, I had the twins, Lauren and Lyndsey. So, now my dad had his hands full will 7 active grandkids. He has nick-names for each one of them and he loves them very much. My kids have wonderful memories of their "Gampy".

I could go on and on about my dad. He is the best dad I could have ever asked for. "Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad". That saying is so true, and that's my dad!

So, dad, this post is for you. On this Father's Day , I wanted to let you know how much I love you and I appreciate you SOOOO much. You have always been there for me and I know that I have disappointed you alot lately but I want you to know that today and everyday after this I make a promise to you that I will get my act together and that I will become a more responsible adult that will be able stand on my own two feet, and to give my kids everything they need. I will try my hardest from here on out to not depend on you to bail me out of trouble because of my stupid decisions. Thank-you for always being there for me and loving me and being a awesome grandparent to my children. They love you so much and I know you love them.

Dad, never forget how much you are loved,wanted,needed, and appreciated. I would not be where I am today without you. God has truly blessed me and I wanted you to know how much I love you and need you in my life. HAPPY FATHER'S DAY

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AUNT KAREN

My Aunt Karen lives in Virginia so I don't get to see her very often but she is very special to me. She is married to my Dad's brother, Chuck, and they have been married for along time, 17 years I think, anyway, today(5/11) is her birthday and I wanted to wish her a Happy Birthday from all of us here in Michigan!! I wish she was here so we can take her out to dinner and spend some time together. They are coming to MI. in July for my brother's wedding and I can't wait!!
So, Happy Birthday Aunt Karen. I hope you have a wonderful day and know that we are thinking of you and we love you and miss you very much. You are the best Aunt I could have ever asked for and you are very important to me and my family. I love you:)

p.s. This is an old picture that I had stored somewhere on this computer. That good-looking guy is my favorite Uncle Chuck!

I'VE BEEN TAGGED!!!

7 Things you may not know about me:

1) I have serious road rage issues! Marvin says my personality changes when I drive. People make me made when they do dumb things while driving. Talking on the phone and driving is the big one nowadays. People can't drive the speed limit and talk on the phone at the same time. SHUT UP and DRIVE!!!

2) My biggest fear is spiders and centipedes! I once called my dad at work to tell him there was a centipede on the ceiling and I needed him to come home and get it. Wrong... he told me to get a broom and hit it, so I put the phone down and got the broom and smacked it and when I did I screamed. He wasn't sure what was going on.

3) I asked Jesus in my heart when I was 19 yrs old and haven't looked back. One of the greatest moments in my life.

4) When I was little I was playing outside in the snow and there was ice stuck on the fence and I wanted a bite of it and when I took a bite I got stuck. My tongue was stuck pretty good and I couldn't talk so I screamed and my brother finally heard me and got my parents, but by the time they got to me I had already ripped it off and I had a fat tongue and couldn't talk and had to go to ballet that night!! Just like "A Christmas Story".

5) One of the biggest tragedies in my life was when my 4 week old Niece, Amber died of crib death(SIDS) when I was 17. It was one of the worst experiences of my life and one I'll never forget.

6) Since I was about 12 yrs old I always wanted to be a cop. I wish now I would have done it but I always have that desire to go hang out with a bunch of cops and take people down!! I'm also good at catching shop lifters!!!

7) One of my biggest regrets in life was that I did really bad in high school and I wish I could do it over again. Now I push my kids to do their best so they can be successful and go to college.

That's it for me.

One Year=success or failure???

Well, one year ago today I joined weight watchers! It has been a hard year. I was very successful in the beginning. I dropped a total of 41 pounds and thought I was on the road to skinniness!! I was looking pretty good and my self esteem was through the roof! Unfortunately, all good things come to and end:( Even though I have yet to say the two words I normally would say given the situation, I'm still not going to say them. I have gained a good portion of the weight back, more that I want to admit but I just can't seem to get back on the band wagon. I also gave up Pepsi and have recently started drinking it again after a year of being Pepsi free. I don't really have a good explanation as to why I had this set back. Everyday I try to get back up but it gets harder and harder. Gastric bypass sure looks good right now! That would be the easy way right? So the journey continues.. I am looking forward to the nice days outside so I can get active again. I got new roller blades last week and I'm ready to get some exercise!

I do have some good news to share... Tomorrow I start training at the new Meijer in Allen Park!!! I'm really excited to start working again and making some extra money. Brand new start in a brand new store.

The kids are on Spring Break this week and we have been doing stuff everyday to keep busy. Monday we spent the day at COSI in Toledo, with my dad. This morning we went bowling( as usual the kids all kicked my butt)then this evening we went skating with the girl scouts (the new roller blades worked good) Tomorrow we will sleep in and I start work in the afternoon. Marvin is off on Thursday, so If I don't work we will do something with the kids. (Boy that sounds strange..work)

Well, that's all 4 now.

YELLOW BELT

Ashlee graduated on Friday to a yellow belt in Tae Kwan Do. She has been in TKD since October and is on her third belt. She loves it! On Friday, she had to break her first board. She got up there and practiced on a pad first and she kicked hard, then he put the board in front of her and she kicked it and I heard her say oww! I got a little nervous after that but she shook it off and tried it again. They can keep trying until they break it or it starts to hurt too much. She kept at it until about the forth kick and she broke it! I was so proud of her that I got all weepy. She was so excited and so were we. It is so rewarding to see your child accomplish something that they worked so hard on. It was a very proud moment for Marvin and I.

Best Friend

Having a best friend is one of life's greatest blessings. I have had the best of a best friend! Malinda and I have been best friends for about 15 years. I can't even remember how we got to become BF but I am so glad we did. In those 15 years, we have been through alot together. We've laughed, we've cried, we've lost loved ones, gotten married, had children, traveled together, and have never really fought about anything. Whenever something big happened in my life, she was and still is the first person I would call. She has always been there for me and has encouraged me in everything I have done in my life. Some of the best times in my life have been with her. We have had some difficult times in both of our lives but we have always been there for each other and knew we could count on each other.
Malinda, I love you and I have been so blessed to have you in my life. I cherish the times we've had together and I look forward to more great times together. Always remember that I will always be here for you and I am so honored to be your best friend:)

HAPPY 8th BIRTHDAY, ASHLEE

My girl turned 8 years old yesterday(2/5/07) On our kids birthdays we let them pick where they want to have dinner, and she chose Amigos. She loves the chips and salsa, which is mainly why she chose there. She ordered a hamburger! She's like me! They brought her out her own ice-cream and she liked the ice cream part of it but not the coconut and nuts. We are having a big birthday party on the 17th so the twins can celebrate their birthday which is on the 16th.

TIN GRINS ARE IN!

Matthew became even more handsome when he received his braces yesterday! He was excited to get them but I was afraid he would be in alot of pain so before we went I gave him some Motrin and he did fine. Braces have come along way since I had mine. I remember my teeth hurt so bad that I couldn't eat! His are fine. He likes them alot and smiles more.

Time to change

Well, after being a stay at home mom for 9 years and all my kids being in school full time, I decided it's time to get a job. Starting on Monday I will be working during school hours at a daycare taking care of infants and toddlers! It is actually a blessing because I have the perfect hours and I still will have quality time with the kids plus we finally will have two steady incomes! That has been the hardest part for our family. As the kids get older they require more stuff and it will help out alot to have that extra cushion. I am looking foward to having something to do during the day and also helping Marvin out with the finances. Wish me luck:)

New Year Resolutions

Okay, another year to make some resolutions. Hopefully I can stick to them:)

1) Lose another 40 pounds (Lord help me!!)
2) Develop a closer relationship with God (quiet time,bible study)
3) Yell at my kids less and hug them more
4) Have more date nights with my husband
5) Be a better steward with the finances (no more impulse shopping)
6) Help people that are less fortunate then me
7) Keep my house cleaner so I won't be embarrassed when people stop by
8) Get a J-O-B! (oh my has it really been 9 yrs?)
9) Be more patient(especially with the kiddos)
10) Develop a better self image!

Well, let's see later on how I'm doing with these goals for 2007!